Search Engine Booble Goes Public in Historic IPO*
"The Dot-Com Boom is Back!” Say Wall Street Analysts
New York, April 1 – Booble.com, the adult search engine, announced the completion of its first full day of trading as a public entity (NSDQ: BOOB). The company priced 5,000,000 shares at the upper range of analyst estimates, settling on $10 per share. The offer raised $50,000,000, which the company says will be used for general management purposes. Following a frenetic day of trading, not seen since the height of the Internet boom in 2000, the company’s shares touched $31 by noon, before setting down to $25 at the close. At the end of the day, Booble was determined to have a fully diluted market capitalization of $1.25 billion.
Booblewas founded just 10 weeks ago on January 20, 2004, and in an unprecedented maneuver, immediately filed its S-1 with the Securities and Exchange Commission. The company’s most recent financial report disclosed it currently generates more than $20 million in monthly fees it receives for referring visitors to high-quality adult entertainment sites. "The porn-loving public has spoken,” declared triumphant Booble founder Bob Smart, whose personal net worth zoomed to more than $800 million.
Smart spent the day touting Booble’s prospects on financial news networks before ringing the bell to start Wall Street’s trading day. "Everyone loves this stock,” said Technology Analyst Steven Malarkey of Credit Suisse First Boston. "The pubic understands what Booble is and what it does. And the fundamentals are strong. These guys print money. It’s unbelievable. And I’m not just saying that because we’re Booble’s underwriters. That wouldn’t be right.”
Credit Suisse First Boston acted as lead manager with Merrill Lynch and Co., BancBoston Robertson Stephens, and Soundview Technology Group acting as co-managers of the underwriting group.
Booble, Inc., is the leading provider of commission-driven search results for the online adult entertainment industry. The company – and its millions of users – often enjoy a good laugh at the expense of greedy stuffed shirts by creating a media stir around its otherwise unexceptional products.
Copies of the Prospectus relating to the offering could be obtained from Credit Suisse First Boston Corporation, if in fact there were an actual offering, and Credit Suisse First Boston were actually involved. Instead, inquiries made at CSFB about Booble are likely to be met with confusion, hostility, and possibly the issuance of restraining orders.
This press release shall not constitute an offer to sell or a solicitation of an offer to buy, nor shall it constitute anything other than a creative and irreverent way to say: “Please, visit our web site at Booble.com for more on this historic event.”
* IPO = Incredible Parody Opportunity, which could not be passed up by those scamps at Horndog.com, The Men’s Entertainment Network, creator of Booble.com
